Everyone wants to help

The memorial service for Ben is going to be this coming Wednesday, and like the Make-A-Wish event we planned everyone wants to help. Maybe this is our way of helping to grieve, or to feel a sense of supporting the family when normally we would be wringing our hands and wishing we could do something. The outpouring of support is phenomenal to see, especially people without a first-hand relationship to Ben, but rather have been living through the story that has been on-line. There has been no end to their generosity. What I find truly uplifting is when random vendors who we approach to help out at the event either provide incredibly steep discounts or sometimes no fee at all to help out. It has been written in newspaper articles and on said on television shows that our society is numbing. With wars and conflicts constantly going on and being shown in live color in our living room 24/7, that our minds are numbing to pain and grief. Nothing could be further from the truth.

As I am assisting with this event I am touched to see such an outpouring of support from literally hundreds of people. Is it because they each have a story to tell where they have been touched by cancer, or maybe because they have children and the thought that it might happen to theirs is too horrifying to contemplate? Either way they are neither numb nor deaf to the cause of providing. This has not been limited to simply the memorial service but has been ongoing for 8 months ever since this whole journey began. This is what makes our society so strong, is the way we stick together in times of hardship and need.

Personally I find that different things will affect me at random times. Working throughout the week on my normal job has been therapeutic as it has allowed my mind to wander to other topics and concerns. Yet a simple medical call to a child in our day care center, sends back memories to the hospital. Hearing children talk about family trips to Disney takes one back to how this all began. Creating the slide show of pictures from Ben’s action packed life threw me for a while until I could get my emotions in check. I don’t know which was worse, visual reminders, or songs I remember being played over and over again on the ipod in the hospital. So as we continue to plan this service I know I will hit little bumps in the road that will cause emotional turmoil, however I would much rather remember this unbelievable kid as compared to forgetting and numbing.