The West Wing

So arriving here in Las Vegas for my next show I check into the hotel of the week the MGM Grand. Now when I am going to be at a hotel for more than a day or two I like to ask gently for a nice room. Usually they oblige since I ask so nicely and am so cute. Ok we will let that go for now. So I ask at the front lobby, and they sorry but they have placed me in the West Wing. Now I don’t know the West Wing to a chicken wing so ask what is so special and she replies that is their newly renovated state of the art electronics. Now what could be state of the art in a hotel room?

I get in and am not disappointed. Plasma TV built into the wall hooked up to a DVD player (so I don’t have to use my laptop), a CD alarm clock, and the best part…a tv built into the glass of the mirror in the bathroom. I mean how cool is that? Not only can I listen to the audio in the bathroom, but actually watch tv while shaving this cute face. I will take pictures because this is an impressive room.

Other than that Vegas has changed a bit since I have been here. I went to the new TI (Treasure Island) to see their new and improved sexy stage show outside. Gone are the days of pirates against the British navy, now it is topless pirates sporting six packs abs like you have never seen (woman start drooling here) and the sirens in tiny sport shorts and lingerie (men start your drooling here). The only think they forgot, is any acting, dancing or singing talent, but they were interesting to watch. So I went to Bellagio since at least their show always raised a smile on my face. But alas it was not meant to be a good day, Bellagio has changed their style as well, instead of coordinating the water with the music, they just have a bunch of random water movements without any music. So disappointing.

Here is where it gets interesting. Last time I was here it was so easy to spot the hookers. I mean granted they have a kind of look in their eye, but they dressed a certain way. The problem now is that every 17 to 22 year old dresses the same way or even worse. How is one supposed to tell the difference anymore? Not that I really need to, it is just a humorous observation. More to follow.

DNR

Talking to an acquaintance last night after a couple of weeks was an interesting experience. We haven’t talked in a little while so it was the usual catching up banter, what are you up to, what did you do today. I had given blood that day (something to do for a good time). But followed was one of the most interesting conversations I have had with someone in quite some time. It started off with her remarking that better me than her donating blood. Just doesn’t see the point in it. Ok fair enough, not going into the whole altruistic saving of a life thing, instead settled for what goes around comes around, you never know when you will be in a car accident and need some blood. The next part is what floored me.

Keep in mind I am talking to a young lady in mid 30s, who then stated that blood transfers were not for her. If it is her time after a car accident, no transfers for her. I thought she was kidding initially, but it turns out she actually has a living will to that affect stating she does not want to be resuscitated (DNR). As a medic I told her that might be great but in the field we don’t know about her living will. So we ended up having an entire conversation how she can buy a bracelet to identify her at a DNR. Hmmm, I know grandparents or senior citizens who might be contemplating that, but a perfectly healthy young woman. Turns out she is scared of all the diseases she feels she could get from blood transfers. Not going to put a judgment on this thought process, but clearly not my opinion.

Gentle rain,

There is nothing more relaxing or soothing than waking up to the gentle sounds of rain. The sounds of water flowing as the rain drops hit the puddles. It is a great way to wake up with your eyes still closed and you just have to smile, because it is just so relaxing. But wait a second, I am not camping and I am not in a tent, I shouldn’t be hearing rain in my house. This is when that wonderful relaxation and calm evaporates like a bit of smoke on a blustery day. Adrenalin surges through the veins as I jump out of bed looking for why I am hearing rain at (it turns out) 3am. Well fear not my roof has not blown away, my window was simply left open to let a bit of cool night air in. Ok now I need to somehow get back to sleep, with all this left over adrenalin still just hanging around waiting for some excuse to be of use. No problem, sleep eventually comes.

But then the alarm comes, way too early. I drag myself out of bed, stumble to the bathroom to do my usual bathroom stuff, and then back to the bedroom to get dressed. It is at about this point when I realize I am not really doing any of this, I am dreaming of doing this morning routine. The only thing worse than having to drag yourself out of bed, is having to do it twice the same morning. I need to start having more interesting dreams (which is ironic since I ended up having a great dream about being at a nuclear sub base for college kids, something from X-men meets Hunt for Red October).

Finally I would like to clarify something from my last blog entry since I have gotten a couple of comments about it. This was concerning the person who unknowingly said some things that hurt. So these are not person things, rather a whole different scenario. Picture this, you have a great dog growing up. I mean you and this dog were the best of friends, you did everything together. Got him as a puppy when you were just a bit of a cub yourself and grew up together. At some point the dog dies, now of course thinking about him might make you somewhat sad. So now fast forward a few years and someone is talking about this great new dog they got, which of course inspires memories of your childhood friend. There is nothing to do about it, but this is the type of scenario where someone is telling you about their life, which reminds you of something in yours that brings about feelings that you would rather keep hidden. Just wanted to clarify.

Summer is here...well soon

Well summer may not be here, but it is getting close which means it is time to get into that gym and lose that winter weight. Yes I know I talked of this before but what I did want to talk about is how bloody hard it is to lose that winter weight. Working out, eating VERY right and doing all the proper things, well man we are still not going to look like Brad Pitt (hey you know I was trying). We try not to get disheartened, but I am telling you, sometimes you wonder what the point is.

When you wake up and every muscle you have is screaming after the workout the day before. When the stumble through the apartment putting on gym clothes, packing your work clothes and tripping down the stairs at the still dark hour of 5:15am. You drive to the gym, not remembering the roads you drove or the speed for that matter and before you know it you look around and you are sitting in a parking space at the gym. Another successful drive without knowing it. You gather all your belongings and join the line of zombies who are waiting in the same agony to get in and torture their bodies for the glimpse hope of bettering themselves or maybe just waking up. You turn on the tunes in your ear without ever hearing them. You step onto the elliptical or treadmill and begin movement. Slowly at first, trying desperately to stretch the muscles and ignore the messages your brain is receiving as it wakes up saying, ‘what the hell are you doing body, go back to bed!’ You continue through the workout, waking up slowly but surely, stretching the muscles and then tearing the very fibers as we endeavor to make the bigger and stronger. Each repetition pulling the fibers further and further, tearing them from one another until you can barely lift your hands over your head to wash your hair. You smile to yourself in the shower, now that was a good workout. Welcome to the really weird mind set of morning gym-aholics.

On a completely different note, but still referring to pain, have you ever had someone say something to you that really hurt you but completely unintentionally? Someone you care about and who just doesn’t realize that something they said really hurt. You don’t want to say anything to them, but yet you sit there with this pain deep in your stomach, as it twists into knots. You struggle to get up and walk to clear it out, but you are frozen into that position repeating it over and over in your mind. You try to blow it off, but at 3am it wakes you up and you think about it. Sometimes I think our minds are too aware for our own good.

Life update?

After getting a couple of gentle reminders that I have not been as diligent updating my blog in the recent past, I am going to endeavor to do a better job in the more recent future. Is it possible my life is actually busy enough that I don’t have time to talk about it? Probably not, maybe I am just lazier than I expected.

This past weekend was the start of Passover, a celebration of when the Jews left Egypt and began their first guilt trip experience of having to walk through the desert for 40 years. You don’t think that is a guilt trip opportunity? Imagine Jewish friend saying to non-Jewish friend, “My family had to walk for 40 years just to get to their home, what did yours do? Ride on a boat?” Ok maybe a bit of a stretch, but all the same you get the idea. As part of this holiday is to try to have a special family dinner called a Sedar (think of last supper), I attempted to fly to Tucson to be with my Dad’s sister’s family as well as my grandmother.

I have learned one small lesson on Friday night. San Jose is just not the airport to try and fly out of on a Friday night if you are flying stand-by. These are all little 50 person planes and you know the crazy thing, all 50 people actually show up? Go figure. I think I should stick with 200-300 person planes, the odds are better. But indeed by Saturday noon I made it down to the warm climate of Arizona. It was pleasantly warm, with torrential rain off and on all weekend. “This is the desert right?” My mother kept asking as we got soaking running from place to place. If the definition of a desert is that they get less than 10 inches of rain a year, well I think they got half of it this weekend.

But no matter as we did not fly down there for the weather, instead it was to spend time with family. My grandmother, although a little older these days (aren’t we all) can still pull out early memories of raising my father and his sister like they were yesterday. Now although I will not repeat most of the stories, there is just one that I love and have to share. My grandmother thought it would be wonderful for my father to be a dentist, not a doctor. Yes very unusual for a Jewish mother to not want her son to be a doctor, but she was worried he would have to make house calls in the middle of the night, a reasonable concern. So for his eight birthday she gave to him a skull with a do it yourself dentist kit allowing him to practice his oral surgery right from the comfort of his room. Mothers out there, this is NOT what we want at age eight. For that I excuse my father for so many of the things he did to my sister and I.

But overall a good weekend, always fun to catch up with family. It is tough when you only get to see them every six months or so, you try to pack everything in to just a couple of short days. The best is when they ask what is new, and you struggle, not for lack of things to say but there is so much, where do you start? But somehow we unloaded everything and I think we are caught up for the next six months. More updates as the week progresses.

A fun picture from Pompeii to make you smile. Something tells me this was not the original spout from their civilization. 

Steady course

I was talking to a good friend of mine yesterday who is going through a rough time as her life is facing a cross road. The hardest part is when one’s heart and mind tell you one thing, but your feelings tell you another. You want to do something but you are fearful of hurting someone else, even though it might be better in the long run. The old phrase of ‘to thy own self be true’, but isn’t that kind of selfish? We can not go through life just thinking only about how we feel in a vacuum. For instance if I enjoyed wearing a tiny thong and nothing else, does not mean anyone else in the world would want to see that. Ok bad analogy but I bet it keeps you up at night picturing that.

What I am trying to explore though is at what point do you think of yourself first and then a loved one as compared to the reverse? Plenty of couples are faced with this when one person is offered a job in a different city. Someone needs to make a sacrifice, the only question is who. Having never been married, I find myself grossly inadequate to even speak of this issue. But with limited knowledge I have talking to others or even in a coupe of relationships, I have come up with this. If one person is genuinely not happy, not just grumpy but in their heart unhappy, then something needs to change. It is no different than if you absolutely hate your job, if there is no joy, there is no desire to go home and that is just not a healthy way to continue. Can situations change? Absolutely, there are times when one side or another just does not realize what they are doing, and they can make a decision to change for the better. When that happens you can see some of the strongest relationships come forth. At other times, well a different outcome occurs.

I guess I end this with, listen to your inner voice, Jimmy Cricket knows what he is talking about.

A Goal for the Summer

Summer is just around the corner and that means swimsuits and days at the beach or pool. As such the mass migration begins just as it does in early January when vanity filled individuals (myself included) flock to the gyms to lose that winter weight. They stretch and groan, and run and limp while all the time watching in the mirror hoping to see the faint glimmer of improvement.

Why do we do this?

For the single people, that is self-explanatory. It is likes moneys cleaning themselves in the yard and ridding themselves of ticks and fleas in order to appeal to a mate. But the ones that are in relationships now that is harder thought. Maybe it is the spring air the wakes us up and reminds us that we do not belong behind a desk and we need to take care of our bodies. Or maybe it is simply we are embarrassed by that winter weight and hope it would just go away. For whatever the reason, the influx of those people to the gym is considerable.

However I have one small cautionary note for all you winter birds coming it. IT IS HARD to lose that weight. Talking to one of my friends in the gym, his theory that if he can just grow the size of his arms and chest, it will make up for the stomach. Hmmm, what would I look like with a chest the size of my stomach? May soon be time for the man-bra. Ok so that theory, only holds up to a point. So I asked another individual (it was an interesting day at the cardio machines) and his theory was no matter how lean he got, he was never going to get a six pack. Now that is something I could relate to, I have tried when I was a better younger man (in college) and there was no six pack action going on no matter what I did. Finally, one other individual who is a bit more senior in age (and seniority) said that was all too complicated, all he is trying to do is stay status quo or at least keep the pace he falls down that slippery slope to a minimum. Now there is a man who has a firm grasp of reality.

Whatever your goals or reasons, do not expect fast results, but if you are doing it for more than just vanity (that rules me out) you do feel great after a good workout and does get your blood moving either in the morning and later in the afternoon. So pick up a dumbbell or a yoga instructor (they weigh about the same) and flock my friends, flock to the gyms, Spring is upon us!

I am a planner

Now this is a post that is long overdue, and something I have wanted to write about since I returned from Italy. I am a planner, I know this, and although I can take changes in an itinerary or plan usually in stride, major changes will increase my blood pressure.

Flying standby is like playing roulette with an entire vacation or trip. Not knowing until 5 minutes before a plane is scheduled to leave if you are going to make it or not. Not knowing if you are even going to make it to the correct city or where you are going to route just to make it home. It was not unusual growing up for our family to fly from Florida (where my grandmother lives) to Denver, to Washington, to Chicago just to make it home to Milwaukee. You could be home in either 3 hours or 23 hours.

If these two ideals seem to be in direct conflict you would be right. Growing up that was all I knew so it was something to just endure and go with. Now I am flying an average of 100,000 miles annually with the airlines but all of it on paid tickets. These are tickets where I can plan to the minute in many ways my trip and the work I am going to get accomplished. For four years I have gotten spoiled and returning back is not so easy.

Flying to Italy and returning was just such an example. This was a family vacation (our 21^st annual vacation) and the trip was made from three locations (Baltimore, San Francisco, and Cairo) all on standby. Returning home after an extended vacation is always a test of patience, for two weeks the family has been trapped in a steel container, otherwise known as a car, and is itching for space and a sense of order that our normal day-to-day life brings. Trying to get home, I was calling friends to try to arrange a ride to pick me up from the airport without really knowing when we were going to get home, but having a rough idea. Flight was supposed to be wide open, 50 or so open seats as of that morning. No problem. Then the axe falls, weight restriction due to cargo, they can’t fill the plane completely with passengers. Immediately the mind tries to plan what other flights leave that day and instead of arriving late morning into CA, we are looking late evening or even the next day. Plans go out the window, lack of sleep rises up, blood pressure increases, heart rate quickens, and the taste of disappointment permeates the entire mouth. But then they might have seats, but wait other employees somehow snag them (although technically my mother outranks them). More disappointment. But then we make it, but only two of us, mom is left behind. Exuberance explodes in the body, but also a guilt of leaving the provider of those seats behind.

This is a taste of what it is like to fly standby. To any and all who have felt the result of my disappointment either verbal or just through body language I apologize. It is hard for me as a planner to face that rollercoaster of changes that happen so quickly. You don’t deserve it, and for that I am deeply sorry.

Fate vs Free Will

I just finished reading interesting book titled the Time Traveler’s Wife, in this story a woman is married to a man who time travels without control of when or where he is going. Besides some of the comical nature as well as tearful parts of the story it does raise some interesting questions, one of which is do we believe in fate. In this story the time traveler believed everything was fate and he was merely an observer on the ride that we call life. He wanted to change things, but yet was unable to. He was also fearful he would not meat the woman of his dreams, but there was no need to worry, as fate would have it when he least expected it.

Moving away from the story this is a topic I would like to explore in more detail. How many of our friends or family wonder if they will ever meet their true love, or even any love? What is the typical response? Fear not, when you least expect it, love will find you. Now this sounds great, but that implies that everything in life really is fate and has already been predetermined. No need to go out on the web seeking the multitudes of sites that proclaim the ease of finding a life partner, or even going to a bar risking the sleazy approaches by the likes of Sly Stan or Greasy Greg. Just live your life and someone will drop into your lap. Can we buy that?

Is that the same with work? Do we really need to stress and fear getting that promotion or next job because it is already determined by fate and we are mere ants that really have no control as to when the rain will come to wash away some dreams or the sun comes out to help our food grow extra juicy. This can be a fairly depressing thought when considering how much time, money and effort we spend tying to improve ourselves for purposes other than ourselves. Now before your hand spasms to the mouse so you click on the comment section and lecture me that you should only be doing things for yourself, we all know that is a farce. We all send those few emails specifically to catch our elder’s mind, or say a few things to bring peace of mind to a family member, or even pass on a favorite food to watch our figure. But wait isn’t that free will? The fact that I didn’t have a second helping of gelato, that was my choice. So if it is my free will as to how I look and how I act, can there also be a certain amount of fate binding our actions to the end of larger results in the future?

If this seems confusing, well you aren’t alone, however really think about it, in relation to your past history. Have you ever found you were just at the right place at the right time? That something or someone just seemed to fall in your lap? How about your best friend from high school? Was he or she a neighbor, or maybe just happen to sit next to you in first period algebra. You happened to overhear a VP talk about an concern that you have a solution to while standing in the line at the corporate cafeteria which leads to a promotion or raise. Can this be explained as luck? Is luck just another way of saying fate?

Next time you think to yourself that something was lucky, maybe you should modify that to say that was a nice piece of fate. Sleep on that.

Another day, another plane, another city

Traveling really does take away any concept of free time away you. All the time I thought I had to update this blog has floated away like bread crumbs in a river, or maybe closer over a waterfall.

So within 36 hours of arriving home from a great family vacation, I was on yet another plane to Orlando FL for another work event. To give you an idea some of the type of speakers I see at these shows, well got my first Star Trek analogy in one of the presentations yesterday. Comparing Microsoft and Java to Klingons and Federation. Oye! But I am in a beautiful Orlando resort location and have yet to enjoy the 5 hot tubs, and the massive pool they have, but I plan on it, rest assured, I plan on it.

Want to back up to family vacation for just a second. This was our 21^st year that our immediate family has gone on a family vacation together. Not all four of us have gone every year, there are times when one member or another can’t attend due to life, that is the rarity. Typically it is all four. Our interactions have changed from when I was 5 and my sister 8, to now when I am 25 and she is 28, but still we not only put up with each other but even share a laugh or two. I very much count our family lucky that even after 21 years we still enjoy traveling together which many people can attest to can be a stressful situation especially with lack of sleep and close quarters. Which leads to my next point.

I am a planner, I know that. I like it when I have a rough plan on what I am going to be doing for the next day, next week and so forth. Things change and modifications need to be made, and I am cool with that, but I tend to like having a small plan. Flying stand-by (which is what we do since my mother works for one of the major airlines) is an entirely different world. This is a situation when not only do you not know when you might arrive at a location, you might be flying to an entirely different city if the flights look better. Well these two paradigms are in complete polar opposites. As when two molecules collide the explosion can be a wonder to see, so can it sometimes be when a planner travels standby. The mental anguish of flying standby starts with the hope that the flight looks wide open, so shouldn’t be a problem, so lets arrange someone to meet me and pick me up. 30 minutes later, they have weight restrictions (too much cargo) so it might be tight. 15 minutes later, well looks like there is no room, so we will have to wait 4 hours until the next flight. 10 minutes later, might be one or two seats, hold tight. 5 minutes later, nope no seats we are about to close the door. 5 minutes later, oops we have two seats, which of the three of you want to go. And you wonder how my family has developed a nervous tick. Well this is a challenge to me who traveled 130,000 miles last year on paid tickets where not only do I know exactly where I am flying and when, but I am in the first group to get on the plane. To any and all who might have felt my frustration in this process in any manner, I apologize. It is a challenge for me, I know that.

Until my next update, enjoy your day where ever you are.

From a sea side town

It is amazing how different a country can appear from a main capital city to the quaint shore towns that make up the countryside. The capital city of Palermo was a bit sad with the huge amount of polution including both air and noise, the dilapidated state of most of its landmarks and buildings in general not to mention the crime we were continuously warned about. Nothing like being woken up at 6am by the sound of nails being drilled into a wall like 10 feet away. We never figured out where they were doing, but suffice to say we were up early this morning.

Instead of staying another night (we are nothing if not quick learners) we decided to head to a quiet little sea side town just about an hour outside of Palermo. The weather in memorial to the Pope has been raining off and on, and more on than off for a couple of days now, however that did not dampen our spirits as we took off in our rental car to find this great restaurant written up in the travel book. Now if you have not been to Euope before picture streets that are literally 10ft wide with cars parked on one side. Not much room to drive comfortably let alone uncomfortable. Add to that the fact that streets, dead ends, and one way boulevards are unmarked at all lead to very interesting car tales. I will hand it to my father he can back down three blocks with inches to spare on either side in a diseal stick shift like no ones business. Props off to him as the rest of us cower in the back seat unable to look.

One more full day and we begin our journey back home. Lots of great stories and even more pictures to share. As for now I bid you all Ciao.

writing to you from Sicily

I am using the hotels computer behind the front desk so I will have to keep this fairly short, but yes I am writing to you from the wonderful island of Sicily. If you are following the events of late, the pope is clearly of ailing health and although most of the stations here in Italy are talking about nothing else, they are all doing it in Italian, so I promise you, you are getting more up to date information than we are.

But the trip itself so far has been great. A detailed description of the trip accompanied with pictures will be entered upon my return but a couple of highlights.

The flight in from German to Rome was so full I had to sit in the flight attendants seat (not with her in it) for the duration of the flight, facing the back of the plane with a 5 point harness. A very different experience.

Watching a country filled with Fiats, Peugets, and Smart cars only to rent, you guessed it a Ford Focus. Although a stick shift, it is a desel so handles much different, many stalls in awkward places.

We climbed Mt. Etna, which is a very active volcanoe to the height of 9,800 ft where there was a snow storm amongst the swirling of sulfur gas. Quite an experience, especially for four people who brought swim suits.

Crossing streets here is like watching Al Pacino in Scent of A Woman. You blindly wakl into traffic hoping they slow down or swerve. That is the only way to cross any of the streets.

More later, but we are all doing well and hoping we will be able to find a hotel room in Rome for one night before we fly out. Looks like that might be a little difficult.

All my best to everyone, and much more to follow.